Like most authentic, self-respecting Zionists, we were shocked to learn that the Zionist Organization of America (ZOA) has lost its tax-exempt status with the Internal Revenue Service. In the same highly credible, professional and responsible way that ZOA President Mort Klein has built his reputation and organization, we would like enlighten the public as to the truth behind this travesty of justice.
We’ve identified two IRS agents who were responsible for recommending the withdrawal of ZOA’s non-profit status. For our own security, we won’t identify them by name but we will share with our readers the unquestionable facts about these two people. One of the two, is known to his supervisors and colleagues by a name that suggests that he is of Anglo-American descent. In fact, this IRS agent, 3-4 times each week can be seen dining at a Middle Eastern restaurant near his office. And as we all know, such establishments are more times than not just fronts for radical Muslim organizations intent on destroying Israel’s best friend, America. In fact, within earshot of other customers, said IRS agent always greets the matre-di with, salam alaikum! Still wondering which side he’s on and who he is really loyal too?
The other IRS agent who participated the ersatz review of ZOA, actually has a name that suggests that she is of Jewish descent . But a closer look at her lifestyle, personal history and associations make her real loyalties obvious. Said person with a Jewish name in fact belongs to a LGBT synagogue; has a Pakistani female “roommate,” not to mention a third cousin who is a member of that pro-Hamas organization known in this country as “J-Street.”
It should be quite obvious to real Zionists who care about truth and justice that the facts outlined above make it abundantly clear that ZOA is the victim of a covert Muslim-radical-terrorist plot to delegitimize the only Jewish-Zionist organization in the world that can be relied upon to tell the truth about who can and who cannot be trusted when it comes to the Middle East conflict.
BTW, those of you readers who might still harbor some doubts about the facts outlined above, please be advised that
This is disgusting gossip. Lashon hora! You should know better. So ignorant.
I’m sorry Saul that you didn’t realize this was satire. Anyone who follows Mort Klein knows that he is of that for all his “smarts,” his humanity is boorish and simple. He feels qualified to divide all people into two categories, good and evil. He more times than not will accuse good people, good Jews, good friends of Israel who don’t agree with his extreme right wing positions of being Muslim/Arab sympathizers (and of course in his xenophobic world, all Muslims and Arabs are Jew killing terrorists). This column was intended to suggest how someone of Klein’s limited sophistication might interpret his current crisis with the IRS.